Sentence The Seventyninth
Being possessed of telegnosis, or the Third Eye as her wee Heilan' Great-Grannie Maude MacGregor was wont to call it, in her wee Black Hoose on the Misty Isle of Skye, Maude Lyttleton's 'feminine intuition' as it was airily dismissed by the materialists of Academe, rarely let her down – if there was an emotional Higgs-Boson particle zooming around the circle of her Lovers and Acquaintances, threatening a cataclysmic explosion, she could detect it with unerring speed, and her categorical declamations were ever heeded by those who knew and trusted her discernment; but the one accidence of intonation – often referred to as the Antipodean Interrogative because of it's origination 'down under', obviously – that enquiring uplift at the end of a statement or sentence always caught her off-guard, and she would begin to offer an answer before realising that none had been called for – so when, over breakfast the following morning, when the Eightsome Reel were eating with the ravenous hunger of the sexually sated, Ello, her Caddy, turned to Maude and gently laid her small tanned hand on Maude's thigh and asked, in an undertone, “hey Maude, you really shagged me last night?” and Maude, unprepared for it, began to mumble something which might have been an explanation of extenuating circumstances, or an apology for acting under the influence, or simply that she found Ello's delicate features and caramel colouring irresistibly sweet, but she stopped as Ello squeezed her thigh and said, in a voice as soft as down, “best night I've had since I came to Scotland,” and Maude realised that her normally razor sharp acuity had once again let her down when faced by a person from the farthest reaches of the Good Old Empire and she lifted Ello's hand to her lips and kissed it gently.
Being possessed of telegnosis, or the Third Eye as her wee Heilan' Great-Grannie Maude MacGregor was wont to call it, in her wee Black Hoose on the Misty Isle of Skye, Maude Lyttleton's 'feminine intuition' as it was airily dismissed by the materialists of Academe, rarely let her down – if there was an emotional Higgs-Boson particle zooming around the circle of her Lovers and Acquaintances, threatening a cataclysmic explosion, she could detect it with unerring speed, and her categorical declamations were ever heeded by those who knew and trusted her discernment; but the one accidence of intonation – often referred to as the Antipodean Interrogative because of it's origination 'down under', obviously – that enquiring uplift at the end of a statement or sentence always caught her off-guard, and she would begin to offer an answer before realising that none had been called for – so when, over breakfast the following morning, when the Eightsome Reel were eating with the ravenous hunger of the sexually sated, Ello, her Caddy, turned to Maude and gently laid her small tanned hand on Maude's thigh and asked, in an undertone, “hey Maude, you really shagged me last night?” and Maude, unprepared for it, began to mumble something which might have been an explanation of extenuating circumstances, or an apology for acting under the influence, or simply that she found Ello's delicate features and caramel colouring irresistibly sweet, but she stopped as Ello squeezed her thigh and said, in a voice as soft as down, “best night I've had since I came to Scotland,” and Maude realised that her normally razor sharp acuity had once again let her down when faced by a person from the farthest reaches of the Good Old Empire and she lifted Ello's hand to her lips and kissed it gently.
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